Friday, December 08, 2006

Panties for Britney -- Please!





We think we’ve figured out the reason for the recent rash (oops, no pun intended…but did you see that razor burn? That’s gotta hurt!) of Britney Spears sightings sans underwear. After putting our two formidable intellects to work on this perplexing, not to mention unsightly, problem, we’ve concluded that K. Fed took possession of Britney’s panties in the divorce settlement thereby leaving her shame bared to the world.

Therefore, in the true spirit of the holiday season, we would like to propose a “Panties for Britney” drive. As mothers ourselves, we know that now Britney is a single mother, she’ll need to be more careful with her health. Just think, if grandma was right about going outside without your hat helping contribute to you catching a cold, heaven only knows what going out like that could cause you to catch.

“Panties for Britney” would be a public service campaign as well. No longer would the rest of us need to scrub our eyes with steel wool to rid ourselves of the images seared into them after viewing the photos of her five-o-clock shadow.

With your help we can keep this from becoming an annual event. On behalf of Britney and the rest of mankind, give generously… PLEASE!!!!!!!

Post by E

Graphic by L

5 Comments:

Gene Bach said...

Most of the men in the world would probably rather see her stay pantyless. LOL! I honestly would know who she was if she came up and bit me, but if you're trying to get her a new outfit I could chip in $.03. That's the least I could do for someone who's down on their luck.

Women on the Verge said...

We applaud your effort to rid the world of this eyesore! By the way, we are fairly certain that you would NOT want to be bitten by her... at least not until she's gotten all her shots.

Not Your Mama said...

I can contribute. Now that my township has overturned our "flying the US flag only" ordinance I am no longer flying my undershorts on the flagpole and would be delighted to donate them to Ms. Brittany, freshly washed and dryed in the Nevada sunshine.

Any trace radioactive particles are gratis.

Women on the Verge said...

Welcome Mama! We appreciate your donation greatly and feel that any radioactive particulate just might help cure that annoying rash Ms Brit has recently developed...

Panties said...

Take a look at:

http://www.myspace.com/pantiesforbritney

It's the world's greatest 'living' art project and a bit of 21st century madness - all about sending underwear to Ms Spears!

The media has made much of the fact that Britney Spears has been snapped without any panties and has painted her as a slut and a hussy.

But what if that is not the case?

What if she simply cannot afford them after spending all her money on nappies for her baby?

Panties for Britney has been set up by a group of unknowns to help her out by sending her knickers.

To buy someone underwear is usually a personal gesture by a partner but the media has given us an overly intimate knowledge of her.

This project is a comment on how celebrities are stripped off their privacy and everyone can help out by sending new, unused pairs to us so we can forward them to her.