Thursday, February 08, 2007

A Winning Strategy




The following was written by Andy Borowitz... enjoy!!!!!


February 6, 2007

Biden Returns to Campaign Trail With Duct Tape Over Mouth

New Strategy to Keep Candidate On Message

In a bold new strategy to keep his candidacy for the 2008 Democratic presidential nomination on message, Sen. Joseph Biden (D-Del) returned to the campaign trail today with a strip of duct tape over his mouth.

Political veterans were hard-pressed to think of a candidate who made a successful bid for his party’s nomination with a piece of duct tape sealing his mouth, an orifice generally considered necessary to emit human speech.But after their candidate stumbled out of the gate by making seemingly condescending remarks about a fellow candidate, Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill), advisors to Mr. Biden seized on the duct-tape solution as the best way to hit the campaign’s reset button.“Every time Joe opens his mouth, he gets in the way of his message,” said Carol Foyler, a media advisor to the Biden campaign. “Duct-taping his mouth shut is the best way to get his message out there to the American people.”

At a town hall meeting in Davenport, Iowa, Mr. Biden seemed upbeat, offering this response to a voter’s question about Social Security: “Mmmmghfffmmmggh.”

According to Ms. Foyler, for the remainder of the 2008 campaign Mr. Biden will be relying heavily on hand gestures and the art of mime to make his case to the voters.“Biden ’08 is going to be a cross between a political campaign and Cirque du Soleil,” she said.



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11 Comments:

Women on the Verge said...

A hat tip to two crows for sending this to me!! It made my day!

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Mother Marlene said...

a much better strategy than allowing him to speak. i would bet his approval rating will sky rocket!

TomCat said...

I saw this and liked it. Another good point is that he will only need one finger to complete all necessary communication with the GOP. :-)

Not Your Mama said...

Love it. And to think, people used to mock me back in the day when I said Biden was not the sharpest tack.

Seriously, I don't think he's Darth Vader or anything, probably means well as far as I can tell but the man is consistently slow on the uptake (wanting to divide Iraq when the Iraqis are unwilling to do so, oh puhleeze) and clueless about human relations.

We've already barely survived 6 years of "clueless about human relations" let's not go there again.

RUTH said...

Wish some of our politians would do the same!
Love tomcats comment...very subtle!

COLORADO BOB said...

Well, it made my night.
Here's one for ya via Dexter at Crawfordslist.

Referring to being in a heated building when it was nearly zero F outside, John Keating, the host of Detroit Red Wings hockey pre-game coverage, led off by saying "...like the Florida-bound astronaut, I report to you tonight in complete comfort."

Nice new look ... I can see the changes.

COLORADO BOB said...

One request.
Open your dashboard and click template. Then click this :
Change the Blogger NavBar
That blogger blue sucks. Try the sand colored one.

Women on the Verge said...

Glad to oblige, bob....

L

COLORADO BOB said...

Much better .... I never liked that blue on anything.

TomCat said...

Why, thank you, Ruth. :-)

Women on the Verge said...

... and my husband says I'M bad???

:-)


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